Saint Velentines
Doug trying not to dance with Veronica, Spence's drunk mom in "S'Aint Valentine's" in Season 1.
King of Queens Episode
"S'Ain't Valentine's"
Season 1, Episode # 16
Episode # 16 in series
Originally Aired: February 8, 1999
Aired on: CBS-TV
Production #: 118
IMDB: S'Ain't Valentine's
Written by: Story by: David Bickel
Teleplay by: Nancy Cohen & Michael J. Weithorn
Directed by: Rob Schiller
Guest stars: Grace Zabriskie
Anne Meara
Sean Bergin
Janet Rotblatt
Steve Schirripa
Amy Stiller
Shaun Weiss
Episode chronology
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"Crappy Birthday"
Court Date
S'Ain't Valentine's is the 16th episode of The King of Queens. Written as a teleplay by Nancy Cohen and Michael J. Weithorn from an original story by David Bickel, the episode, which was directed by Rob Schiller, originally aired on CBS-TV on February 8, 1999.


Doug's romantic plans with Carrie are hijacked by Veronica, who has planned a last-minute surprise party for Spence. Arthur meets a woman at a Senior Center dance.

Plot summaryEdit

On what becomes a bad Valentine's Day, Carrie and Doug have plans for a nice dinner out. But first, Doug must go with Deacon and Richie to Spence's Birthday party, which falls on Valentine's Day. When Spence finds out, he storms out, and now the three must stay with Spence's unstable mother. Meanwhile, Carrie waits for Doug, and chats with a man who just got dumped at the restaurant.

When Doug doesn't show up, as he is last at Spence's house, Carrie and the man have dinner, and Carrie teaches him how to be a gentleman. In another subplot, Arthur meets a woman at the senior center dance. They both claim to be married, and plan to have an affair; while they are dancing, just as they decide go back to her place, Arthur meets her daughter (played by Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara's real-life daughter Amy Stiller), who let's the cat out of the bag, as she asks her mother "Ma! So, Ma, you met a fella after all, huh?" Eventually the two decide to get a nightcap as Arthur suggests at the cafe at the St. Argyle Hotel!


Did you know?
  1. This is the first appearance of Spence's mother, but this is the only time she is portrayed by Grace Zabriskie. She is later portrayed by Anne Meara, Jerry Stiller's (Arthur) wife.
  2. In this episode, Anne Meara portrays the woman that Arthur likes at the Senior Center dance.
  3. The daughter of this woman would later portray a coffee shop worker a few times later in the series.
  4. The man that Carrie had dinner with, appeared four episodes earlier in "Fixer Upper".


Main/Recurring castEdit

Guest starringEdit